Friday, February 4, 2011

Why “ME” Always!?!?!?

I never thought this would happen again to “ME”, but life is indeed a mystery. It’s time I accept the FACT, I’ve FAILED to be successful in PERSONAL RELATIONS, probably its time I can stop looking forward for it!?

Life has number of surprises for all, sometimes pleasant and sometimes unpleasant ones. But then we have to move on and I am not saying this, this is what we are hearing and we were taught from our childhood. Since childhood I am doing it religiously, but... but it bleeds, when TRUST breaks in personal relations and we try hard to cope with it and move on in life. Every time we try not to think about it, we end up sulking and wondering what things otherwise could have been, still we desperately try and finally we fail and the pain spreads on all over our body and cripples us...sometimes even chokes.

Looking back, I wonder why did I land up in something like this again? Where did things go wrong? I know, I can never get answers to those endless questions that run in my mind. Do i deserve this? Maybe, I do. Maybe I am paying for the “SINS” that I have committed. Maybe someone else is also writing something like this somewhere and I am responsible for it??? I do not know. How long will I have to pay for my SINS???, if any. Often we wonder what would happen next, only to find out that the reality is so very different from all our wonders.

Am I talking all non-sense? But then why is that I can’t move ahead with the flow, like rest?? Why am I holding back??? Is something still ahead for me, for which I still need to wait???? Would I ever meet happiness again????? Would life ever take a different course from here for “ME”??????

Looking forward to hear back from “HIM”, Desperately.

- Shastry MVN

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